S.T.I.C.S Poets – D’evil

This right here is not a regular poem,
this is not a,
happy poem nor a poem that I’m expecting you to feel good after reading,

this is a, poem for the ones who hide behind reality,
this is a poem dedicated not to the ones whom believe that their actions are of angel’s

this a, poem for the d-evil that lives within some people that needs to be spoken of and addressed,

shadows follow the victims into their nightmares
where lights start to scare,
but, on or off doesn’t really matter when you’re a child and you have no choice,

you’ve grown up thinking it’s normal for grown men to touch young boys,
what good does it do talking about sexual intercourse and how to protect yourself in class,
when, i’ve seen naked bodies lie on top of me since i was about 9,

hardly understand rights from wrong,
sweat dripping off the bed corner, who ordered comfort?
holding hands,
him penetrating a youth, a child, an infant, incest, bond to give complex,

uncles touching younger family members,
what the **** is wrong with u?
nobody loved u as a youth, answer me?
why is my future ****ed up cause of your past?

i could have become a doctor,
i could have become a righteous type of police,
you know the,
types that are supposed to protect good peoples living in our society,

now u can catch me in lower class clubs,
don’t really think that I’m worth very much
so i,
hang around whoever is willing to pay me any attention,

battling my own demons,
cause the one who sent them is on another level,
if he had the audacity to touch me
than im prob not the first nor will i be the last,

i got this confrontation every night with myself in the mirror like,
i got the biggest mouth out of all my friends
but why didn’t i say anything?
he used to say that to me too…
a lot more than words can fit in that mouth…

friends weren’t informed cause,
who wants a friend who can’t stand for himself,
every day became judgment day and i was on trial as an oppressor
even though i was the one being oppressed.

pushed, living on the edge, but not in that exciting way,
for who hides at the bottom of the canyon if not Goliath,
and forget David’s sling shot,
this paper beats his rock
so this paper witnesses the shock – of our reality,

like that’s not enough,
these, people fly over seas
to practice Gandhi’s theory of non-violence and,
for rupee’s, Indian kids are being tempted to touch tempted to touch,
d’evil whispers, and it creeps,
T.L.C, the, tender love n care was present,
and i can swear that u can have your gift back,

don’t take candy from strangers
but why do strangers offer it to kids?
i once told this doctor that it makes me sick that i don’t have the patience needed,

needles, Conceited, options about meetings,
the medicine is quarreling with my feelings,
guaranteed to be floating on cloud 9,
but in hell i’ve already been,
in fact, the contracts have already been signed,
you can go from summer to winter
and i guarantee that the wise will do nothing but to keep watching,
…but you can’t go back in time

not in my mind,
i don’t mind looking you straight in the eye
because today,
today i am but a ghost,

i’m the child that commercial such as ECPAT speak about
speak about, speak about,
why are you freaking out?

does my voice disturb you?
does the truth bring creeps to your body?

i used to have a body,
dreaming about being somebody,
monozygotic left the other half with bottles of hypnotiq
half psychotic, my body was my temple

psychologically demolished,
moved into shaitaan’s house and turned it into my home,

and even though im carrying the same secret that many in this room have,
im still trying to rest in peace,
while our oppressors will still remain unknown,

…so cold,
i shiver when i speak,
now i am but your bitter conscious that wouldn’t call for help, ashamed,

…i saw what he did to you,
and i’m sorry for not stopping him.